Surviving a Long Term Relationship Breakup

Relationships are hard to maintain and a breakup can be one of the worst thing to deal with, especially if it is a long term one. Dealing with a long term relationship breakup is often painful and extremely difficult.

The entire gamut of negative emotions one has to go through during a breakup can make it hard for one to distinguish between which one is connected to your current situation and which ones are those from the past. It is necessary to separate the feelings from the past and those which are relevant to your breakup so as to effectively deal with them.

The grieving process doesn’t come easily and you will find that you have to move slowly and in stages in order to get over a long term relationship breakup.

In the beginning, you will feel as if you are in shock at the happenings. You will most probably find yourself in denial that the relationship is over. Sometimes the shock is such that you will become numb. Everyone will find themselves feeling confused and trying to make sense of it can be difficult. A feeling of not being in control of your own life, of being adrift without any purpose or direction are some of the emotions you will go through during this period.

The next stage of the grieving process involves feeling anger, fear, panic and eventually depressed. This is a very critical stage and is generally the longest stage wherein you are buffeted by so many different emotions and feelings. You find yourself panicking at the future ahead, you will worry about how you are going to survive this, you will find yourself bursting into tears without warning, feel totally depressed and dejected. Feeling all these emotions as well as the inability to let go of them are natural. The way to healing comes from permitting you to feel the emotions and eventually letting it go.

Getting over a long term relationship breakup might take approximately a year or more, since it is not easy to let go of all the accumulated feelings and forget the shared memories of so many years. We feel as if we do not have the right to grieve over a failed relationship for no more than a few weeks or a couple of months. But the reality is often different as it is not that easy to move on and get on with one’s life after a long term relationship breakup. Everyone should take their own time, how much ever that might be, so as to recover from the pain and move forward in a positive manner.

The final stage of the grieving process involves acceptance and the acknowledgement to yourself that you are going to be fine eventually. Slowly, you will begin to feel less hurt and anger and instead you start to feel good inside. This can be a fluctuating thing, with the feeling good replacing feeling anger and hurt, occasionally. That is normal and part of the path to recovery. Eventually, the good feelings would start to dominate the negative ones and you will find a better understanding of the entire issue and find that you are finally ready to move forward with renewed hope and positivity.

Nurse yourself back to emotional health by filling your life with people who loves you and activities you enjoy and you will get over your breakup with less damage. It needs a lot of courage and patience to eventually come out of a long term relationship breakup.