Live-Ins Before Weddings

It is commonly believed by many today that couples living together before marriage have a bigger challenge to face if and when they actually decide to tie the knot. It is a highly debatable matter as to whether cohabitation is indeed a better option prior to actually getting married or not. Some are of the opinion that those who have had multiple live-in relationships before being actually wedded have suffered lower levels of satisfaction, greater instability and likelihood of break-ups than those who have not been chosen living together before marriage.

Most of us know of at least one live-in couple who are not married and numbers are steadily on the rise. For some it is better than living by oneself and a system that is free of commitments and expectations. Some others feel that in a marriage boredom sets in pretty soon, ties deteriorate and may eventually culminate in an unpleasant divorce. Our parents have done their bit in trying to imbibe in us the values of a family life and in trying to convince the present generation that living together before marriage is both not ethical and impractical.

Elaborate studies on this topic have come up with some interesting observations:

• Those who are into a live-in relationship seldom get married in the end.
• These couples tend to have nasty and faster divorces.
• Extra marital affairs are most commonly found amongst those individuals who are sexually active prior to tying the knot.
• These couples are scared of commitments and are wary of taking up responsibilities.
• They usually lack mutual respect and their marriage rests on a high degree of mistrust.
• Such a relationship is likely to have a negative impact on the couple’s children later.

These bleak facts are scary but true and are often found to be holding good if one seeks to analyze some common experiences faced by such live-in couples. Such couples tend to ignore sensitive issues and seldom discuss their problems. They are keener to somehow suppress their anger and refrain from pointing out the other’s fault because they cannot handle criticism of their own flaws. They are more likely to have their earlier existing relations with friends and family hampered as a result of this arrangement. More often than not these couples fail to grow financially and contribute selflessly to what they call their home.

Regardless of these disadvantages, living together is still being encouraged and preferred by several new age couples. It is looked upon as a test to check whether they are compatible physically and emotionally and when one fails this test it can be seen as assign to move on without the legal hassles of a divorce. The number of couples trying out this arrangement is increasing by the day and the trend is not likely to fade away very soon.